CONFESSIONS

  • THE SKINNY ON MY FAT

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    Confession: I am being very vulnerable today.

    12 years ago when I met my husband {who was my trainer then}, he introduced me to a valuable measuring tool for health.  It was about a week after I’d began training with him and I still felt very middle-school-crush type feelings when I was with him.  After all, I was easily 70 pounds heavier than him and he was a very fit and very attractive guy.  I was totally crushing and didn’t think the feelings would ever be mutual.  Then he asks me to ride to town with him?  Um, yes.  What I didn’t know was this wasn’t a joy ride or a date {I was a big dreamer, okay?!}, it was an appointment at a local gym to have our bodyfat percentages tested.  WHAT?  I did NOT sign up for this, Mister!  Get me out of here.  How mortifying! 

    The experience was humbling, to say the least.  Of course Z made me feel completely comfortable and encouraged me that this was a great measurement number to have moving forward so we could see more of my progress.  I still have that little piece of paper from the test.  I was well over the 35% mark, falling into the very obese category for my age/gender/height.  But, I was encouraged to think that it could only get better from there.  2013-01-16 Body Fat PercentageFrom that point and over the next several years I worked hard.  I did cardio, I lifted weights, I drank lots of water and ate six healthy meals a day.  I was conscientious of what I put into my body and at my fittest, I got down to 19% bodyfat.  The scale had gone down too over time-about 50+ pounds over time-but the bodyfat was a much better indicator because I had turned so much of my fat into lean muscle. 

    Fast forward to having three beautiful baby boys, gaining & losing weight, finding this great program and becoming a coach, and recently losing 30 pounds.  The scale was at that plateau point it likes to sit at and I was frustrated.  I needed a kickstart.  Enter April 7th 2014.  I started a 6 week spring leaning challenge.  It includes 5-6 days exercise each week, healthy eating, lots of water, and utilizing body fat % as a measurement point rather than the scale alone.  I weighed in on day one and had my bodyfat tested.  I will do both again at the end of the six weeks. 

    I debated about putting these stats & pics up, but I’m nothing if not forthcoming and authentic, so here they are: {I’m 5’6”}
    Starting Weight: 163.0
    Starting Bodyfat %: 28.1  springleaningbeforepicI am on day 11 of 42 & feeling pretty dang good.  Sore, but good.  I’ll continue posting things I’m learning along the way + recipes/meals/workouts/tips & tricks here and on my Facebook page & Instagram account, so follow along, join in, and kick butt!  Oh, and go get your bodyfat tested.  The scale only tells us so much.  scalecannotmeasure{pic via google images}

  • EASY SPAGHETTI SQUASH DINNER

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    I figured since I wrote about spaghetti squash Tuesday I’d share one of my favorite quick & easy ways to enjoy it. 

    First, cook your squash {easiest way for me is to poke holes in it all over using corn skewers, set it on a plate & microwave for 5 minutes.  Turn it over & microwave it again for 5 minutes.  Let cool a bit, cut in half, scoop out & throw away seeds, scrape out squash in spaghetti-like strands with a fork & store in a tupperware container in your fridge}.squashandtunaQuick Tuna Squash Dinner Bowl

    Put 1-1.5 cups spaghetti squash in large bowl.  Heat it.
    Add 1 tsp. fave oil {olive/coconut/avocado} or 2 tsp. fave light butter {healthy fat}
    Open 2 cans tuna & drain.  Add 1.5 cans to your bowl {feed leftover half can to your cat or kids-they’ll love it!}
    Sprinkle with lemon pepper & 1/2 T. parmesan cheese.
    Heat again for 20-30 seconds.
    Easy, healthy, delicious!  ENJOY!

  • NOW VS. MOST

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    Confession: MOST times I just want the spaghetti instead of the squash.

    Spaghetti squash, that is.

    You know, you substitute spaghetti squash for spaghetti pasta noodles and it tastes exactly the same, right?…WRONG.  It doesn’t taste the same.  Because it’s NOT the same.  It’s a vegetable, not a pasta.  And although it’s a dang good substitute {and extremely yummy}, I’d rather go into it knowing that it doesn’t taste the same.  Or have the same texture.  Or smell.  Or yummy starchy goodness.  Don’t lie to me & pretend it’s “exactly the same!”

    I actually do love spaghetti squash.  I love using it with meat & Alfredo sauce made out of cauliflower {ha!  this is actually one I prefer!}, and roasted with a bit of butter & salt & pepper.  It’s obviously a great choice-check out the nutrition comparison!

    But, I like being aware that I’m choosing what I want MOST {weight loss, good health, light feeling stomach} over what I really want NOW {delicious heavy carbs, preferably smothered in butter & sauces}. Spaghetti-Squash-vs-Spaghetti-1in10This is something I discuss with my clients on an almost daily basis.  We have to be willing to give up what we want now to get what we want most.  Yes our program will get you to your goals.  No, the food will not taste like the food you’ve been eating because it’s very healthy & is a short-term tool to help you learn long-term habits.  Choosing what you want most over what you want now looks different for everyone, but may include one or more of the following:

    -Going to bed at 10 instead of staying up to watch one more episode on Netflix
    -Eating things you don’t want
    -Not eating things you DO want
    -Drinking water instead of soda or alcohol
    -Exercising instead of crashing when you get home after a long day’s work {or first thing in the morning or late at night}
    -Spending time in self development instead of playing candy crush

    I’m not saying there isn’t a place for birthday cake, Netflix shows, late night dates, and a night out with friends.  But, if you really want what you say you want, you will have to choose what you want most over what you want now on a daily basis to get it.  Make the choice once.  Then make it again the next time.  Soon it gets easier and becomes second nature.

    Then, before you know it, what you want now IS what you want most.  Like the fact that I now always choose spaghetti squash over pasta & every night in maintenance I choose a Medifast brownie over any other dessert…because it’s yummy AND it supports what I want most.  Go after it!  And as always, call me if you need help.
    [And for an awesome resource on substituting the better choices for the wanted choices, check out this post.  Image via there, as well.]

  • BITE YOUR TONGUE

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    Confession: Words often have the ability to make or break my mood.

    My primary love language is words of affirmation.  I love compliments {sincere ones, of course}, I love chatting with people, connecting with others through spoken & written word, reading amazing books filled with incredible words, quotes, speaking love into those around me, and sending notes of well thought out words to people I love.  Words are POWERFUL. 

    They tend to stick with us. 

    Although we all heard the old adage, “sticks & stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” we all know it’s garbage.  Words CAN hurt.  They CAN also lift us up.  A well timed uplifting gift of encouragement through words can brighten someone’s darkest days as much as an ill timed snippy/crude/sarcastic comment can darken someone else’s. 

    Two specific examples have been on my mind lately.
    1. A cousin of mine {who is & always has been extremely thin} called me chubby, fat, fatty, etc. almost daily on the bus to & from school when I was in Elementary school. {Crazily enough I was probably totally average in comparison to most kids-he was just super thin!}

    2. Throughout high school I had a friend who had the same first AND last name as me {different spellings on both counts} and instead of separating us by the first letter in our name “Karli with a K, or Carly with a C,” they called us “big Karli” and “little Carly.”  Guess which one I was?  How awesome it was {n’t} to be called to the office over the intercom for a phone call or to grab something as “big Karli.”  I was taller, but also heavier, so the word encompassed both meanings. 

    Although I’m older and thankfully had A LOT of encouraging words spoken to me by my parents, siblings, other friends & family members, teachers & mentors, etc., those words have stuck with me all this time.  That cousin is now a fantastic husband and father and I don’t hold those things against him.  He was a kid.  I know he wasn’t thinking then that the words he was saying would affect me for years to come.  Just like I know the well intentioned people at school weren’t thinking about what that title meant. 

    I read a book about a year ago that has stuck with me.  The Four Agreements, by Miguel Ruiz.  A phenomenal read.  It was life changing for me in its truth & simplicity.  Recognizing & being aware of the four agreements has been critical in my self improvement and growth in the past year.  It has impacted my role as a wife, mother, friend, child of God.  I can’t recommend it highly enough.  The first agreement just happens to be “Be Impeccable with Your Word.”  Read the book.  You won’t be sorry.  Then come share your experiences & thoughts with me!impeccablewithyourwordI challenge you to go out & speak love into someone’s life today.  It may be JUST what they need.

    {image via: http://ourgeorgiaroots.com/tao-of-luckie-the-four-agreements-walking-in-wisdom-2014-is-my-year/#comment-6667}

  • PLAYING THE VICTIM

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    Confession: sometimes-because I’m a food addict and have to be aware of food on a seemingly constant basis-I play the victim card.

    It’s not pretty. 

    I feel sorry for myself.  I whine, bemoan my circumstances, cry to my husband about how it’s not fair!  It’s not fair that I can’t eat whatever I want, whenever I want, in the copious amounts I want!  It’s totally not fair that he {seemingly} can do those things {although he doesn’t}, and it’s not fair that I may have to work on my relationship with food my entire life.

    I play the victim.

    Enter Maria Semple’s book, Where’d You Go Bernadette? I read it last month.  One of the characters is a member of group called VAV: Victims Against Victimhood.  Their main learning tool is to TORCH: Time Out Reality CHeck {you or someone else calls you out & helps you see reality & your part in the victimization process + a better way to deal with it & move forward}.  Although this is a funny part of this fictional book, I seriously related with this concept!

    I can either play the victim role or come to grips with reality. 

    Namely: I can feel sorry for myself or BE proactive in becoming a better me.  Appreciate what I have.  Enjoy the things I do eat.  Realize that this weight loss phase is not forever and that I can enjoy things I love in moderation when I reach maintenance.  Come to grips with the fact that LIFE IS NOT FAIR.  And that’s okay!  It doesn’t mean it’s bad.  It doesn’t mean I have to whine about it. 

    I loathe the feeling that comes from being the victim.  So I refuse to play that card anymore.  I plan on taking responsibility for the choices I make {good & bad} and not blame {a victim behavior} anyone or anything else.  My situation & reality are mine and all I can do is learn from it, make the best of it, and move on. 

    That said, if you catch me playing the card, please feel free to TORCH me! (;victimIs there a “victim” in your life?  Is it you?  Are you ready to take charge & not let anyone else, including yourself, victimize you?

  • PACK THE SCALE

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    Confession: I took my scale on vacation with me.

    Yep.  Last week the Mister and I took our boys and escaped to the mountains for a few blissful days of much needed R&R.  I majorly over packed, as I am generally prone to do, but one item I do not regret making room for despite it’s awkwardness is my scale.  I debated in my head beforehand, but ultimately decided to throw it in and boy am I glad I did. 

    My weekly weigh in day is Sunday and I am a strict once a week weigher.  Weighing daily just makes this girl flippin paranoid and we DO NOT need any of that in this house.  Once a week suits me fine.  I knew we’d be gone til Monday and I wanted an accurate accounting of the previous week.  We headed out Thursday and had a great weekend!  So thankful for the sweet men I’ve been blessed with and loved spending a perfect Valentine’s day {read: jammies all day, making them a big delicious breakfast while drinking my on plan hot cocoa, watching Disney movies & Full House episodes, reading, cuddling with all four of my guys} right at the stage we are at in life.  meandboysblogSo Saturday night I was STRESSING.  I had done well all week on plan with everything I have control over.  But, one thing I couldn’t control was the lack of sleep I got almost all week because of a teething + fussier than normal baby.  Sleep or lack of it majorly affects my weight loss each week, so I was preparing myself for a minimal loss or even maintaining. 

    Sunday morning I jumped out of bed {isn’t it fun to WANT to weigh?!} and hopped on the scale before getting in the shower.  I let out a WHOOP!  I was down 2.6 pounds for the week and in the next set of tens: 159.0!  Yay!  The mister celebrated with me and I was on cloud 9 all day!  159blogThe new number was exciting, but the coolest part was definitely staying on plan despite being on vacation and NOT FEELING DEPRIVED!  Taking my scale was a definite motivator for keeping me accountable and keeping me on track in body + mind.  So if you’re doing awesome and have a tempting trip planned, pack your scale!  Then let me know how it goes! (;

    {FYI: total loss since 10.20=28.8 pounds.  If you need help getting to your weight loss goals & want a self proclaimed awesome health coach, reach out!  Through March 2nd you can receive up to $70 off your first order-ask me for details!}

  • ONE.SIX.THREE.

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    Confession: I cannot remember things.

    Seriously.  I rarely remember specific details of my childhood unless someone brings a story up that reminds me or I read through my journal/look through my scrapbook.  It’s totally sad because I had a wonderful childhood and I’d love to have a better memory of the day to day & big events.  Even to this day, I am an avid documentor {journal/picture taking, etc.} because I know if it’s not written down & captured for us & our kids, I will not remember!  How sad, huh?

    I do seem to remember several humiliating moments more clearly though {bummer!} and I recalled one in crazy detail recently.  A couple weeks ago I weighed in {I’m a strict Sunday weigher} and realized I was only pounds away from a weight that carried a lot of emotion for me.  It brought all the details & feelings rushing back.  Here’s the scoop:

    It was my freshman year of high school.  PE class.  Girl’s locker room.  Our teacher {aka: very fit & athletic track coach} + her assistant {also very fit} had all the girls in my class line up in the locker room.  There was a scale-the old fashioned kind you stand on & they have to manually move the weights on the scale’s top & bottom row to find your exact weight-standing at the front of the line.  Each girl was required to stand on the scale where they’d find your weight & say it OUT LOUD to be recorded.  I was a fairly confident person and overcompensated for my weight insecurities by being very outgoing and social.  I don’t think I’d weighed myself in years up to this point.  Ignorance is bliss, after all. 

    The feeling I had in line though…I remember it so clearly.  I was talking, laughing, and acting normal, but my hands were clenched & sweating, and I was picturing what everyone would do when they realized {as if they couldn’t clearly see it by looking at me} that I was so much heavier than them.  I processed the numbers being announced as my small & thin & athletic friends went ahead of me: 105, 112, 117, 130.  Completely acceptable numbers for darling freshman high school girls.  Then it was my turn. 

    I stepped on the scale & I swear it took 20 minutes for them to decide on a place for those dang balances to land.  163.0.  Said loud & clear. 

    I was mortified!  I was a good 30-60 pounds heavier than 99% of the girls in my class!  I was already well aware that I was the largest of my girlfriends, but this announcement just shouted it to the world and made it so REAL. 

    Although I’m a {more} mature adult now and realize that 163 is a completely okay weight for a woman who is 5’7”, I still get a terrible taste in my mouth when I see that number on the scale.  It’s amazing to me how powerful childhood experiences can be and how they stick with us and mold us into who we are.  For this reason, if I am ever in a position to voice my opinion on weighing young girls for a health class or any assessment, I will strongly urge & suggest that it’s done discreetly {or not at all & base it on a different set of standards} & helpfully instead of flippantly and openly.  {To be fair, I don’t feel like my teacher was trying to embarrass us-it was protocol for her to do it the way she did-and, she had always been thin, so it probably didn’t even cross her mind as to how it would affect those of us who struggled with our weight & athleticism}. 

    So in full disclosure, two days ago on my weigh in I was at 161.6 and I breathed a sigh of relief to have passed a very emotional number.  It’s not that I couldn’t achieve health at 163, it’s that it carries so much “weight” and moving past it feels like such an accomplishment to me.  Here’s to continuing my journey toward health both inside & out.26.2poundsDo you have an emotional number or trigger that stems from a childhood experience?  Feel free to share in the comments or message me at zkyoufit@hotmail.com

    {picture taken last Thursday.  As of Sunday I am down 26.2 pounds since 10.20.13 & am enjoying the process so much.  Contact me if you want help on your journey: zkyoufit@hotmail.com}

  • MOVE MORE!

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    Confession: I don’t really like exercise.

    Gasp!  It’s blasphemous, I know!  Here’s the thing, though.  It’s not that I don’t like all exercise.  It’s just that the thought makes me hurt because I know it will be painful…at first.  I like it-even start to LOVE it-after I’m in a great routine.  It’s that initial few days/weeks that get me. 

    So I hadn’t been moving that much leading up to the New Year.  And by not that much, I mean as little as I could get away with and still be wonder wife & mom, haha!

    I gave my Mister a Nike Fuelband for our anniversary last Fall.  He has been doing Crossfit and loving it and it’s a great way for him to monitor his movement on a daily basis.  He loves it & got the boys involved and excited about checking to see if he’d met his goal for the day yet, but I wasn’t convinced I wanted or needed one {after all, I wasn’t really moving!}, so I was happy for him, but happy with my lazy habits, too.

    Fast forward to Christmas day.  My parents gave me a Nike Fuelband!  I was pretty excited, but also a bit wary to know how little I was doing.  The first week {Christmas day & the December days that followed} I just did my usual thing.  I didn’t go above and beyond or anything.  I wanted to really assess where I was.  Sure enough, I wasn’t moving very much.  I set my goal pretty conservatively for a woman my age & I still wasn’t meeting it every day.  So I started planning my attack.  One of my New Year’s Resolutions was to MOVE MORE. Nike_FuelBand_SE-578-80Then I got super sick the first part of January & was out of it for about 14 days straight.  YUCK!

    Sooooo, January 15th, I started walking on the treadmill.  Nothing too crazy, just walking & increasing my speed/distance/incline a little each day.  Since then I’ve done a treadmill workout every day except Sunday’s!  I am moving more, feeling awesome, loving my fuelband, and seeing progress!  Of course the majority of that progress as far as weight loss is due to the awesome program I follow & coach others on {I’m down 24 pounds & counting!}, but the progress I’m seeing in my body literally changing shape & clothes fitting better also has a lot to do with the movement I’m getting and the muscle I’m gaining. 

    What are you doing to MOVE MORE this year?

     image credit

  • VICTORY OVER COOL WHIP’S AIRY GOODNESS

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    I love cool whip. {If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ll remember THIS post}.  I know, I know…it’s not even a real food! Moment of total transparency: Wednesday I was feeling snacky and pulled a tub of cool whip lite out of the freezer. I grabbed a tablespoon & ate 2T. Then I ate a third. Moment of largely unprecedented victory: then I STOPPED what I was doing & stepped away from the cool whip, CHALLENGED whether continuing to eat cool whip would get me what I ultimately want (rather than instant gratification & delayed guilt), and guess what? I CHOSE to put it back in the freezer, drink 16 oz. water, and get busy doing something else. Overall the 22.5 calories & 4.5 grams of carbs won’t hurt me & the resolve & emotional intelligence I gained will only serve me in future potentially weak moments.  Woohoo for small non-scale victories!

  • STOP.CHALLENGE.CHOOSE.

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    Confession: I am a yeller.

    Here’s the thing.  I wasn’t always.  Growing up my parents didn’t yell.  At us or each other.  I communicated well with them and others.  I got my BA in Communications in college!  I know what’s effective and what’s not when it comes to forms of communication.  Yelling is not. 

    But, after I had my first boy, and he turned 2ish, and he started being kinda naughty sometimes, I just started yelling.  And it became a bad habit that stuck around.  Enter boy #2 and more yelling.  Always yelling about something.  Note: this is not the most effective form of parenting.  Yelling just isn’t good.  It takes away credibility 100% of the time.  It makes me feel guilt.  It makes my kids not like me.  It makes my husband take me aside & suggest kindly that maybe if I didn’t yell, the words coming out of my mouth would be better taken.  It makes me not like me

    Enter the Orange Rhino blog.  I was introduced to this blog 10-12 months ago.  I read her no yelling challenge.  Then I promptly and quickly left her blog.  I wasn’t ready to give up yelling!  It was too ingrained in me.  It was a habit I just knew I couldn’t break.  What she was suggesting was just too hard.  So I kept yelling.  And I kept having issues with kids/parenting/etc., that made me wonder why I couldn’t just figure things out.  I am an intelligent person, mind you.

    Sometime in August I was reminded of the Orange Rhino challenge.  I made the decision to just quit yelling.  Cold turkey.  So on August 18th, I quit.  I didn’t yell.  I haven’t looked back since.  Has it been hard?  YES.  Have there been days where I almost lost it?  YES.  Have I inched my voice up and realized I was on the brink of having a “yell moment?”  YES.

    BUT.  I have realized more than ever that my kids are really amazing little humans.  More often than not, it was ME, not THEM that needed an attitude adjustment.  When I “use my words,” like I encourage them to, we actually have better communication, imagine that!  I know without a doubt that yelling was a bad habit I had developed in my late 20′s and that I am now creating a new better habit {not yelling} to replace it.  I have a long ways to go, but I am aware and conscious, and my kids, husband, and our home are so much better for it. 

    Here is one of the techniques that has helped me best with my goal.  I utilize it often in my struggles with food or to help me stay on plan with my health routine, but I found it awesome in my no yelling commitment as well. 

    STOP. CHALLENGE. CHOOSE.

    When I feel myself starting to break and think I might yell, I STOP. {just stop talking and have some internal dialogue-this may or may not require me to leave the room or situation immediately}

    I CHALLENGE myself.  {Why am I wanting to yell?  What is going on?  Is the situation really worth this amount of passion?  Could distraction, talking it out, recommending something else, letting it go, or laughing change the situation for good?  Why am I lacking patience?  Am I tired?  Hungry?  Bored?  STRESSED? What would choosing something more positive do in this situation?}

    Then I CHOOSE.  {What lasting impact do I want to leave?  I want to feel good at the end of this little occasion.  This is small in the large scheme of things.  How I handle this will have an impact on my entire day.  I want to make an emotionally intelligent and self aware decision.  I will choose to act in a positive way now in this instant.  I can take a deep breath and handle this moment maturely.}

    This technique has helped me hundreds of times in the past two months.  STOP. CHALLENGE. CHOOSE. is awesome for pretty much anything you want to work on in your daily life.  Try it out, and let me know what you think!

    PS: I’m running a SCARY good end of the month deal for new clients right now.  And I’m down 7.4 pounds since I started program again post baby {today is day 10 for me!}.  Woohoo!

    {Results vary.  Typical results are 2-5 pounds the first two weeks and 1-2 pounds a week thereafter}  {image via google}