• talks about her Confessions


    I’ve been slowly reading a book called Made to Crave, by Lysa Terkurst.  {more to come on that later} and in it she coined a phrase that has become one of my mantras the past several months.
    “Desperation leads to Degradation.”
    This shook me deeply when I read it and then I continued to ponder in my mind & study in Dr. A’s Habits of Health, and feel it with my heart.  It’s true for me.  When I feel desperate, I turn to degrading behaviors.  Such as binge eating, staying up way too late, eating crappy-for-me foods, using food as an emotional crutch, being grumpy to those I love most, dropping the ball on my responsibilities, making excuses, the list goes on.
    Feeling desperate isn’t just a rare occurrence, either.  I can reach the desperate point if I’m any of the following: overtired, overstressed, bored, on a tight deadline, frustrated, in a hurry, sad, and/or just waited too long to eat, among others.
    Here’s the dictionary definition of degrade:


    [dih-greyd or, for 3, dee-greyd] verb, -grad·ed, -grad·ing.
    verb (used with object)
    1. to lower in dignity or estimation; bring into contempt: He felt they were degrading him by making him report to the supervisor.
    2. to lower in character or quality; debase.
    3. to reduce (someone) to a lower rank, degree, etc.; deprive of office, rank, status, or title, especially as a punishment: degraded from director to assistant director.
    4. to reduce in amount, strength, intensity, etc.
    So essentially what happens is this:
    I feel bad because I haven’t allowed myself to get enough sleep for several nights in a row {this is a huge one for me}, and I am running on little steam.  My kids are more needy than usual, I have clients that need my attention, and my laundry is piled up.  I am trying to finish a gift for a friend & a lesson for the church class I’m teaching.  All these things build up and suddenly-sometimes within a 30 second period-I’ve reached desperation.  I am in the pantry/fridge/cupboard and have consumed 650 calories without even tasting them or realizing what I’m doing.  After the 2 minute binge instant gratification wears off {within the 2 minutes it took me to consume}, I don’t feel good.
    I feel degraded.  I feel like the lowest character person ever.  I feel worthless, useless, more tired/grumpy/stressed/bloated, etc., and as if I completely ruined my entire day. Each time this happens, a little piece of my confidence is torn off.  It takes so long to build that back up that I seemingly can’t keep up.


    It’s a vicious cycle. {I made this graph to illustrate}

    But, it’s one I’m aware of.  Every single day since I read that line, I’ve said it to myself.  Sometimes multiple times.  Oftentimes when I’m feeling overstressed or tired, or at my wits end with a situation in my life.  “Desperation leads to Degradation.”
    It doesn’t always stop me from eating something I shouldn’t or staying up too late another night or making a bad mommy decision.  BUT, a lot of times it does.  It stops me in the moment & I ask myself: “Am I hungry?  Tired?  Stressed?  Completely overwhelmed?”  I can usually think through & talk myself out of the bad behavior that I’d have made previously in a similar situation.
    And that, my friends, is what I call PROGRESS.
    So I want to encourage you not to allow yourself to get desperate.  If you feel yourself getting close to that edge, don’t let anything push you off.  Don’t allow yourself to be degraded-especially not by you.


    You are worth so much more.



3 Responses to Don’t Get Desperate

  • Sara wrote on January 18, 2012 at 8:44 // Reply

    Thanks karli!

  • Candace Nielson wrote on January 26, 2012 at 10:49 // Reply

    Oh man I really needed to read this one tonight. I had read it before but feel I am in that vicious cycle the last 2 weeks more than ever. I hate it and want to break it. Thanks for always inspiring me.

  • Caitlin wrote on February 7, 2012 at 8:33 // Reply

    I love this! I am in college and for the past two weeks I’ve been in a rut (this rut happens a lot). I’ve been getting really down on myself lately… that hopeless feeling had begun taking over my life (and my relationship with food). This post has been a sort of a blessing. Thank you!


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